October 5th, 22:26 | Meander back from the library; and it was too strength training

Today on the walk home from the library, I passed a 7 of hearts card. For those of you who were all indie, dabbled in Tarot when you were 14, and took it way too seriously, you will know that this is the card of escapism, the card of running away into daydream, rather than facing up to reality and geting your ass in gear. My book (why yes, I did keep the book that came with the deck my dad bought me when I was 14; why do you ask?) has this to say about the card, known to us Arcane Individuals as the Seven of Cups (or Chalices, if you want to be a pretentious knob about it):

Sometimes we find ourselves daydreaming, and fantasy seems to be the easier option. Now is one of those times. However, we should guard against being unrealistic, foolish and unwise. We may be spoilt for choice in some situations. Daydreams have their place but we must realise that we are living in the real world. There is a lot of potential in emotional and financial situations, and we must deal with these realistically. This daydreaming phase can be turned to creativity with a bit of extra thought. We may be looking for some philosophical, religious or spiritual help or advice, and could be doing extra reading in this area. We may look full of confidence, but this is a front.
Should the card be reversed, with strong-will and dtermination we are sure to win through in any situation. We will be logical and clear-thinking and will find solutions easily. Any confusion will be firmly in the past.

Well. If that doesn't sound like my current situation, then it's because I've been so woefully negligent of the blog (sorry). Mostly what I got out of seeing that card (all nestled into one of those heinous plant-beasts of the garden, hosta) was that I need to stop stalling on my presentation because, hey, it's going down on Tuesday, this weekend is a write-off because The Boy and I will be hanging out with family, and the presentation is not going to write itself. (You'll all be happy to know that I spent the evening (blissfully quiet as The Boy is out watching the game with a co-worker) working on said presentation, and it's about 60% done. Now I just need to figure out what the hell I'm going to say. And then translate it into French.)

The uncertainty of the card is definitely there though. I daydream all the time about "one day, when I'm a teacher", or even "one day, when I'm volunteering in classrooms" (that's a little pathetic eh?), but I'm not so good on actually, you know, moving towards those ideas. I don't know how, partly, but mostly I'm just scared of throwing my "career" at Workplace irreparably off the rails. I don't mind change, and often I do like it. This feels awfully like bridge-burning though, and I'm not very good at that.

A couple steps down from the seven card, I also came across the King of hearts (read: cups) grinning up at me from the sidewalk. After the seven, let me tell you, he was a welcome sight. The king generally represents someone well-meaning and wise, warm-hearted, and full of good advice and intention. Most books will say it's someone fair, with a soft, roundish build, and who's born of a water sign. I always think of the King of cups as the "dad" figure. Which I guess works out, since I'm headed back to the hometown this weekend (mmm... turkey...). All in all a weird kind of self-revelatory walk home.

Where, you ask, was I walking home from? Why the library, of course. The Boy, not anticipating the horrendous rush-hour traffic, had dropped me off after work, and then had to hightail it into the freeway gridlock so that he could make it out to the arena in time for the game to start. (Hope he made it on time; it's the second game of the season, and the first one here -- it'll have been packed.) Anyway, so I went to pick up my books on fitness, running, swimming, etc. (see? I am taking this seriously) and then walked home.

Google maps tells me the walk was about 3.2km, which I think is about 2 miles? It wasn't a very long walk, and by no means qualifies for cardio (although I did stop into a frou-frou papery to look at their card stock and scrapbooking paraphernelia which, I am ashamed to admit, did make my heart beat a little faster), but let me tell you those books? Started getting heavy after the first ten minutes. I may not have done my running or yoga today, but I am totally counting that walk as strength training. Oh shut up about your "muscle failure" all you non-gym-newbs. It counts.

In other news, I also got to test-drive my mitts which, as predicted, I made out of the dismantled chunky wool scarf. So now I have mitts to match my hat! They're quite warm (although I'm going to make myself fleece liners for when it gets really cold out) and surprisingly comfortable. My current knitting project (pie-shaped hat for spawnling) is kicking my ass, so I've been hiding from it and working on other stuff. I really should get it done, though, as I'm hoping to give it to a family friend (or rather, her two-month-old daughter) back in the hometown.

That said, I should get back to squawking along with the Dixie Chicks while preparing this presentation (Power Point? May not be my bitch, but we're on carefully diplomatic terms). in the meantime, you all be good. Also: dress warm; it's cold outside.

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