December 17th, 23:38 | Life, the universe, comma splice and everything!

Waiting for the stollen to rise. (Yeah, I love my team that much; for the damn potluck tomorrow I won't be able to go to bed till 1 due to baking this bread thing. My head is killing me and I'm all stuffed up. Take that work loyalty police!) Listening (still) to Tegan/Sara and thinking about stuff.

Occasionally, when struck with fits of madness, I'll worry about what I'm writing, that it's not all deep and significant, essentially that I'm not saying anything meaninful, just pouring out details of my day online, and adding to the loads of crap that make up vast portions of "the web". But then I think about the diaries I read, and the ones I don't.

I'm pretty harsh when it comes to diaries. I'll skim somewhere between three and thirteen new diaries a day, and some of them I'll keep reading, and some I won't ever read again after two paragraphs. Which is pretty cold -- what if that was their worst entry? What if they had writer's block? What if their friend took over their diary for that entry? A million tiny details. But I make snap decisions. And if I think about the ones that I keep reading, that I decide after four sentences that I really like, they're generally the ones that have nothing in them of a "higher thought" flavour. No analysis of life, no overt introspection (I mean it's there in small slices, but no "today, we're going to think about me" kind of things), no deep essays on The State Of The World. Just them. The people around them. Their day. And it's enough.

Hm. Feeling a little lost, a little sad. Mattsy sent me chocolates as a gift yesterday, and a note wishing me a happier year than this past one. :) Amazing how something so small can make me happy. If I think back, there were lots of parts of this year that weren't happy but... there were so many other ones that were. It wasn't a bad year, it balanced out. Still. Feels good.

Shifting into the point where I miss having a boyfriend again. Bleh. Bed. my head hurts and the damned stollen's finally done.

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